The movie “Best Exotic Marigold Hotel” follows the journey of a group of elderly British people who head off to India to what they think is a quintessential retirement home set in the outskirts of Jaipur.
If you’ve not seen it. I won’t spoil it. I will just say that there are a few twists along the way!
It’s one of my favourite movies but not for the reasons you may think. It’s not because I feel some sense of connection with my ancestral home or that I feel some kind of pride seeing India depicted so beautifully on the big screen.
It’s my one of my favourite because it contains some wonderful quotes and lessons which I have found useful when dealing with difficult times in my life, business and career.
#1. “Nothing here has worked out quite as I expected. Most things don’t. Sometimes what happens instead is the good stuff.”
Often when we set in the pursuit of a goal we create a picture of perfection in our minds. The trouble is that if we arrive at our goal and things aren’t quiet what we pictured we can become disappointed, frustrated and even angry.
In that heightened sense of emotion we can get caught up with what is ‘not‘ rather than what could ‘be‘.
Often the way things turn out tend to be better than version you had imagined in your head.
#2. “There is no past that we can bring back by longing for it. Only a present that builds and creates itself as the past withdraws.”
Unless you are Doc Brown, have just invented the flux capacitor and installed it into a Delorean; time travel isn’t something you can do.
No matter how much we we try there is nothing we can do to change what has gone before us. It is pointless holding on to the regrets, mistakes and even victories from yesterday as they only serve in holding us back. All we can do learn from those experiences and bring forward those lessons to help build a better future.
We cannot grab the opportunities of today if we have both hands firmly on the past…you have to let go.
#3. The only real failure is the failure to try…and the measure of success is how we cope with disappointment.
My daughter started school this year and has learnt a new phrase which she proudly screams out whenever she is finding something difficult “If it’s tricky, try and try again.”
Children approach everyday life with a sense of curiosity and bravery which somewhere along the line got sucked out of us as we grew into adults. As a result many of us have become imprisoned by a fear – the fear of failure. This prison holds many of us back from really reaching for our dreams and ambitions as our minds plague us with questions such as “What if it doesn’t work?” or “What I get it wrong?” and even “What will other people think?”
Those thoughts will keep us imprisoned forever if we allow them to. The silly thing is that most of what we fear is far worse in our minds then it is in reality.
Unless we are prepared to fail how can we ever experience true success?
#4. Initially you’re overwhelmed. But gradually you realize it’s like a wave. Resist, and you’ll be knocked over. Dive into it, and you’ll swim out the other side.
Human beings are creatures of habit. We don’t really like change.
Most of us like the feeling of feeling of familiarity and knowing what to expect as it gives us a sense of security.
The moment that a change occurs our flight or fight system kicks in and for the majority of people that means fighting to keep things as they are. They refuse to accept that things are changing and will do anything they can think of to put a stop to it.
The problem is that most often we have no choice as to whether change happens or not. The only true choice we only have is how we deal with it or to be more specific, how quickly we are willing to accept it.
You can invest your energy and time in trying to resist what is happening around you but you will find that at some point you’ll be swept along with tide. Alternatively you can throw away the security blanket, dive in and put all your energy into getting to the other side.
#5. Everything will be all right in the end… if it’s not all right then it’s not yet the end.
You often hear athletes, competition winners and those who have achieved success talk about the level of self belief they had on their journey.
I think self belief is important but I think that there is something greater and maybe more powerful than having belief in yourself.
I’m talking about faith.
When I talk to people who have given up on goal or dream, it is not the lack of self belief that became the biggest problem but a lack of faith the everything will be ok.
Not matter what you go through in life, no matter how hard or how tragic your situation, if you are still breathing and above ground you’re still in the game.
As Rocky would say ” It ain’t over till its over”